George Springer Homer Turns Cruel in Jays 8-6 Loss

George Springer tried to save the evening with one swing.

Very inconsiderate of the evening to already be floating down the Potomac in a barrel.

The Blue Jays lost 8-6 to the Washington Nationals on Tuesday, and Springer’s eighth-inning homer was the strange little sparkle on top of a cake that had fallen on the floor.

It was a three-run shot to center off Gus Varland.

Nathan Lukes scored.

Kazuma Okamoto scored.

Springer circled the bases, and every Jays fan briefly experienced the dangerous sensation known as maybe.

Then the final stayed 8-6, because baseball loves a punchline with paperwork.

The comeback arrived wearing a prank moustache

A late Springer homer should be a good thing.

It was a good thing.

That is the problem.

If the Jays had lost 8-2, you could close the laptop, stare at a houseplant, and move on with the dignified numbness of a person who understands plumbing.

But 8-6?

With Springer going 1-for-3, hitting homer number 12, and driving in 3?

Now you have to revisit the entire mess.

Now you have to think about the first inning again.

Now you have to acknowledge that the Jays were not hopeless. They were merely highly committed to making the route scenic and painful.

Springer did not make the loss respectable.

He made it funnier in the worst possible way.

He turned the box score into one of those novelty cards that plays music when you open it, except the music is a kazoo version of your car alarm.

About that first-inning walking exhibit

The bottom of the first was where the whole night was introduced to the concept of stairs.

Shane Bieber had the ball.

Washington had patience.

The Blue Jays had a rapidly shrinking supply of oxygen.

Keibert Ruiz walked, and James Wood scored.

Daylen Lile walked, and Dylan Crews scored.

Nasim Nuñez hit a sacrifice fly to right fielder Nathan Lukes, and CJ Abrams scored.

Jacob Young walked, and Keibert Ruiz scored.

That was the first inning.

Four Washington runs.

A walk, a walk, a sacrifice fly, and another walk in the scoring ledger.

It had less the feel of a rally than a security line where every suitcase contains a live possum.

Bieber finished with 0.2 innings, 4 earned runs, and 0 strikeouts.

Again, no cruelty required.

The numbers wore clown shoes by themselves.

The rest of the game became Toronto trying to climb out of a hole while the hole kept offering loyalty points.

The middle innings were not boring, somehow

The Jays did chip away.

In the third, Vladimir Guerrero Jr. singled on a ground ball to third baseman Jorbit Vivas. Nathan Lukes scored, Guerrero went to second, and Vivas made a throwing error.

In the fourth, Andrés Giménez grounded out to CJ Abrams at short, and Brandon Valenzuela scored.

In the fifth, Kazuma Okamoto homered to center off Cade Cavalli, his 24th.

That is a reasonable little comeback starter kit.

Unfortunately, Washington kept finding ways to staple more pages to the bill.

Luis García Jr. homered in the bottom of the fourth off Mason Fluharty, scoring Jacob Young.

Dylan Crews homered in the bottom of the fourth off CJ Van Eyk.

Jacob Young hit a sacrifice fly in the bottom of the fifth off CJ Van Eyk, and Daylen Lile scored.

There were useful Toronto pitching lines in there too, because Blue Jays losses enjoy layers.

Brendon Little went 2.1 innings with 0 earned runs and 4 strikeouts.

Jeff Hoffman went 1.0 inning with 0 earned runs and 2 strikeouts.

Those are helpful lines.

They are also the tidy napkins placed beside a sandwich that has been launched out a window.

The box score did its little dance

Toronto had 8 hits.

Washington had 8 hits.

Toronto made 2 errors.

Washington made 2 errors.

This is where a normal person asks how the Nationals won by two runs, and a Blue Jays fan silently points toward the first inning like a tour guide at a haunted factory.

Nathan Lukes went 2-for-4.

Guerrero went 1-for-2.

Okamoto went 1-for-2 with a homer and an RBI.

Springer had the big late swing.

There were pieces here.

Not enough furniture to build a room, apparently, but pieces.

The standings remain rude: 49-59, .454, fifth in the division, 3-7 in the last ten, L1.

The season numbers say 425 runs, 3.94 runs per game, a .242 average, a .682 OPS, and 107 home runs.

So yes, the Jays can score.

They can even score six on the road in Washington.

They can also donate the first inning to chaos and then act surprised when the receipt arrives.

Wednesday brings Trey Yesavage against Zack Littell, with the series split 1 of 2 against the Nationals.

Please, for the love of clean innings, start the next one without turning the mound into a pedestrian mall.